I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
