dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize