my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
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i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
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We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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