I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize