Do you still have your period?
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
