i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
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