Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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