dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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