Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
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I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
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