I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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