Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
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