What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
