EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
she looked like the before picture.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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