quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Even my vagina gasped.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Randomize
