need another drink. this is the easiest way
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize