im drinking this country out of the recession.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Someone shattered a urinal.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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