Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
