literally had 100 drinks last night.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Randomize
