your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
