Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
it hurts more in the daytime
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize
