i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Randomize
