so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Randomize
