We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
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