I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
