I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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