i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
