Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I just cut my nipple shaving
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Drunk is not a location!
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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