does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize
