I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
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