Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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