Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Randomize
