I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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