We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
