Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
