I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
