I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
