Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Randomize
