I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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