You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Reggie can tackle my bush.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Randomize
