i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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