Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
