I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
We need to rekindle our bromance
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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