honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
Randomize
