I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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