I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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