Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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