I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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