i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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