somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
