blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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