Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize